Dzień Dobry

I am convinced that there is never going be a day when I don't miss Poland. It's an infatuation, admiration, and passion that I feel for this country. To say it bluntly: I Love Poland.






Things I Love (and miss) About Poland:

* The History
* The Language
* The Currency (Zloty)--wayyyy more cool than the Dollar or Euro
* The overly nice Polish citizens who would try their best to understand my broken Polish or English. And I especially miss the kind souls who would throw in the towel and speak French.
* The Food
* Krakow, Lodz, Warsaw and Zakopane.

I miss the laugh or smirk that a person would develop on their face when I would say: "Dzień dobry" (good morning/ good afternoon), “Przepraszam”(Excuse me), or “Dziękuję” (Thank you). All words in Polish sound NOTHING like they're spelled, By. The. Way.

"Dzień dobry" = Jin Do-bray
"Prezepraszam" = Pres-hum
“Dziękuję” = Jing-qui-ya

Today I am missing something completely out of the ordinary- I am missing Drozdrowka Z Makiem.

"What's that you say?"

Here it is:

Mmmmmmmmmm.....

It's a deliciously good, hot and sticky, straight from the oven of heaven: Amazing Polish poppy-seed roll.

I Love Poland.

God Bless 'Em.

....and their Żywiec Beer...

Life Exists After College?! Get Outta Town!!

I know, I know. It's been waaaaay too long since my last post, I apologize. However, after 5 years I finally graduated with my undergrad.

GRADUATED. COLLEGE. WITH HONORS.


Anywho... I'm going to be making a couple changes to this blog in the next week..

So, for today, I'm leaving you with one of my favorite quotes for y'all to ponder:

"Life's most persistent and urgent question is, 'What are you doing for others?'"
-- MLK Jr.

A Small Spiel on speaking Yiddish

Last night I read (yet again), one of my all-time favorite books- Born to Kvetch by Michael Wex. If you haven't read it, you should.

Take my word on it.

So, because of that book. Or, because it's Monday. Or, because I like to educate, I decided to list a few (18 to be specific) Yiddish words for one and all to learn.

Let's begin:

1.BUPKES
Not a word for polite company. Bubkes or bobkes may be related to the Polish word for “beans”, but it really means “goat droppings” or “horse droppings.” It’s often used by American Jews for trivial, worthless, or a ridiculously small amount. After all the work I did, I got bupkes!

2.CHUTZPAH
Nerve, extreme arrogance, brazen presumption. In English, chutzpah often implies courage or confidence, but among Yiddish speakers, it is not a compliment.

3.FEY!
An expression of disgust or disapproval, representative of the sound of spitting.

4.GOY
A non-Jew--a.k.a. A Gentile. In Hebrew one Gentile is a goy, many Gentiles are goyim, the non-Jewish world in general is the goyim. Goyish is the adjective form. Putting mayonnaise on a pastrami sandwich is goyish.

5.KVETCH a.k.a. Jules' Favorite Yiddish Word
In popular English, kvetch means: to complain, whine or fret. In Yiddish, however, kvetch literally means to press or squeeze, like a wrong-sized shoe.

6.MAVEN
Pronounced meyven. A maven usually refers to an expert,(often used sarcastically).

7.MAZAL TOV
A saying of a joyous occasion. i.e.: birthdays, bar or bat mitzvah, weddings, etc..
Actually, mazal in Biblical and Talmudic times meant a planet or constellation of the zodiac. The term "mazal" acquired the connotation of fate or fortune. Mazal tov thus literally meant, "may you stand under a good constellation."

See? You learn something new everyday on this blog. Don't tell me you knew Mazal Tov referred to planets.

8.MENTSH
An honorable, decent, authentic person. A man, woman or child who gives help when help is needed.

9.MISHEGAS
Insanity or craziness. A meshugener is a crazy man.

10.MISHPOCHEH
It means family, as in Relax, you’re mishpocheh.

11.NOSH
To nibble- a light snack. But, you won’t be light if you don’t stop noshing.

12.OY YEY/ OY GEVALT
An exclamation of dismay, grief, or exasperation. The phrase oy vey iz mir translates to Oh, woe is me. Oy gevalt is similar to oy vey, but expresses fear, shock or amazement. If you think you might get hit by a car, this expression would be appropriate.

13.PLOTZ
Literally means to explode(from) aggravation. Example: Well, don’t plotz! Similar to Don’t have a cow! Also could be used as, Oy, am I tired, I just ran the four-minute mile. I could just plotz. That is, to collapse.

14.SHLEMIEL
This could be a clumsy or inept person. Similar to a klutz (also a Yiddish word).

15.SCHMUCK
Often used as an insulting word. Example: What a schmuck! Don't say this in front of your grandmother... it literally refers to a part of the male anatomy.

16.SPIEL
A long, involved sales pitch, as in, I had to listen to his whole spiel before I found out what he really wanted.From the German word for play.

17.SHTIK
Something you’re known for doing. Like, an entertainer’s routine, an actor’s bit, stage business; a gimmick often done to draw attention to yourself.

18.TUCHES
Refers to one's rear end, bottom, backside, or buttocks. In proper Yiddish, it’s spelled tuchis or tuches or tokhis, and was the origin of the American slang word, tush.

Now, get out there and use some Yiddish! Oh, and don't forget to pick up this :

Like, how Jewish are you??

I'm Tired. Actually I'm really, really Tired.

One word can describe the week I've had: LONG.

On Monday I drove to the Cities to spend the night at my parents'. I had to be at the airport at 4 am on Tuesday for a day-trip to DC. My parents live about 15 minutes from the airport and I live 2 hours away. Spending Monday night at my folks allowed me to get two more hours of (much needed) sleep...

As I entered my parent's home I noticed a note on the counter written by The Dutchmen:

water turned off in laundry room.

At this point, it dawned on me that Susie Q and The Dutchmen were on Holiday for 10 days in Texas, visiting Divine Miss M and Doc Holiday...

After turning on the heat (which too, had been turned off), I called The Dutchmen to discuss the fact that I was in a house with no running water. The Dutchmen did his best to explain to me how a socket wrench works. Believe you me, it's tougher than it looks. But I pulled it off thanks to The Dutchmen's step-by-step instructions and was able to take a shower before getting a few hours of sleep.

I woke up at 2 am and was at the Humphrey Terminal by 3:30. After spending the day in DC at USHMM, being awake for 22 hours--It was a very Long, Long day. But any amount of sleep deprivation is worth it (to visit USHMM) in my book.

Then, a couple days ago my advisor invited me to share in Shabbat dinner with his family. I jumped at the opportunity to do so. I hadn't seen my advisor/mentor in a couple months as he is on sabbatical this semester.

Friday afternoon and evening I was able to talk and catch-up with my advisor, The Rebel Rabbi about school, life, my future, jobs, etc... The good conversation was followed by an amazing Shabbat dinner. Seriously, Amazing does not do justice to the meal I had last night.

I stayed until around 8 pm and then drove back up to Central MN. I was tired while driving home. Tired yet content. It had been a very good day.


I had to stop at my apartment before going over to Wyatt Earp's house- where I'm house/dog sitting for the next two weeks.

I entered the door to my building, walked up the stairs, turned my key and opened my door. In the entry/hall way into my apartment I have a plaque hanging on the wall. I just bought it on Tuesday at USHMM. It says,

Blessed are you in coming in,

on one side and

Blessed are you going out.

on the other side. In the middle of the plaque there is Hebrew writing.

As I was just about to close the door behind me, I heard a voice walk by that is all too familiar.

It was the voice of a young punk who lives down the hall from me. He was walking by my door and saw the plaque on my wall.

I know this young man in the very loosest sense of the word. He likes to stand outside our building. A lot. If I happen to be letting my dog out (which I often do while I'm outside), he'll usually strike up a small conversation with me.

But nothing, I mean nothing could have prepared me for what came out of this punk's mouth.

Scenario:

Julie has unlocked her apartment door and is walking in and taking off her shoes. She was holding her door open a bit, as she took her socks off.

A young man walks by... pauses and turns around and says in a very loud voice, "Hey. Like, how Jewish are you"?

Julie: "Beg your pardon"?

Punk: "I see that Jewish thingy on your wall". He was pointing his finger at my wall.

Julie: "Oh." I didn't want to pursue this convo any further. I was tired and had only stopped home for a minute or two. I smiled shrugged my shoulders as if to say I dunno, and started to shut my door.

Again, the Punk repeats: " So like, how Jewish are you"?

Hold your Horses. Did this kid actually ask HOW Jewish I am? He didn't ask if I was Jewish. He assumed I was from a plaque. I promise you, dear readers, I tried really hard to maintain my composure as I swung open my apartment door to educate this punk on a thing or two.

I've been trying to keep my cool these days when religion comes up... but this, this put me over the edge.

I replied with the first thing that came to my (exhausted) mind:

Julie: "How Catholic are you"? I had no idea if this punk-kid was actually Catholic, but that's a well educated guess, in Central Mn.

Punk: "What? Um..I guess I'm... oh, wait.... that's right, Jewish is a religion".

Julie: "Judaism is a religion". A person who practices Judaism is Jewish.

Punk: "I always forget that, that Jewish is,... like, yaw know, not a.... a... an ethnicity. Ya know like how Muslims' is........"


Thought in my head:

DON'T DO IT JULIE! BITE YOUR TONGUE! FOR THE LOVE OF EVERYTHING, BITE YOUR TONGUE!!

Second thought in my head:

Aw, Screw it. This kid needed a good lesson in religion and ethnicity (not to mention grammar).

I was now leaning diagonally in my door way, arms crossed, legs crossed, my lips were pursed with anger. My body language alone should have told this punk to back down and lay off the questions.

With my forehead and eyebrows scrunched, I said to the punk, "Huh. So like, what country do the Muslim's come from?"

No lie, it took the punk about 1 second to reply with, "Africa."

My point was proven. The punk was/is an imbecile.

I was shaking my head with disbelief. In a very sarcastic tone I said: "Huh uh. Africa is a continent. The entire population on the continent of Africa are not Muslim."

Punk: "Well, you know what I mean. They're like, over there." He gestured with his hands. "Like, by Africa."

Julie: "Are you referring to the Middle East"?

Punk: "Yea, yea! The Middle East! I forget it's name".

My cheeks were the color of a fire engine. My eyes were glaring. My eyebrows and forehead were scrunched--This punk was making the crows feet around my eyes double by the second. His grammar alone made me want to whack some sense into him!

I was staring at the ground, rubbing my forehead with my hand while I thought about what I was going to say to the punk to make him understand the difference between religion/race/ethnicity.

It was late. I was tired. I started to mumble... "Ya know, I gotta get going". I pointed inside my apartment. "But you, you should really buy a ma... Hold on. Wait! Stay right there. Don't move! I'll be right back!" I ran to my living room wall. I looked over all my maps. After deciding which one I could do without I tore (one) of the three world maps I own off my wall. I walked back to my door while rolling the map up in my hands. "Here," I handed him the rolled map. "Study it. Keep it. When you find the country called Muslim or Jewish, let me know."

The punk, who now had a scrunched face of his own, replied with "Um. Thanks."

Julie: "Seriously. S-t-u-d-y IT."

And with that, I shut the door to my apartment.

Maybe with the help of a map, the punk will be able to realize the difference between religion/race/ethnicity. If not through my map, then that punk needs to start wikipedia-ing in a big, bad way.

Either way, I'm sure the punk will want to talk about this topic (if/when) I run into him again.

I'm going to have to work on my patience until then. Patience is not one of my strongest virtues.

Maps and Blacklists

I'm about 80% positive that I have been blacklisted.

I honestly think that the government keeps tabs on yours truly. I have reasons to believe this. The fact that I always get asked to step aside by airport security for an extra check, is one of the many happenings that has led to my assumption that I am blacklisted. Also, I think it's because I'm not Jewish and majoring in Holocaust Studies. And I order a lot of books online. And maps. And I travel quite frequently.

Have you seen the maps I own?



another view:



Don't mind the Elvis posters and cardboard cut-out.

Maybe it's a little hard for you to see exactly which maps I have placed on the walls of my living room? I'll walk you through a couple of them.

Here is my most valuable map:



Please understand, none of my maps are valuable (money wise), per say. They all have a reason and purpose that relates to my education. Borders, countries, names, etc... are not the same as they were during WWII, so I refer to this map. a lot.

Here's the title and key:


Let's look at another one of Julie's Maps:



This is the small city of Oswiecim located in Poland. It commonly goes by the name the Nazi's called it: Auschwitz.

I have visited Oswiecim twice.



My first trip to this city lasted for 24 hours. Yes, dear readers Julie has slept in the town of Oswiecim/Auschwitz. Right here:



The Glob Hotel. Not Globe. Glob.

My first trip to Oswiecim was with Susie Q and The Dutchmen. The Dutchmen thought it would be a great idea to spend the night at The Glob (about a half mile from Auschwitz-Birkenau) the night before we were to tour the camps. I saw nothing wrong with his idea. However what he failed to mention prior to our arrival, was that The Glob Hotel is located right in front of the railroad tracks. Also, it is the only hotel in the city. You see, most people don't see the positive aspect of spending the night in a small deserted city which houses the remains of the largest mass killing center in Nazi occupied Poland.

Crazy.

Look again:


Railroad Tracks. While seemingly harmless in any other setting I can assure you, they are not as peaceful when you're staring out a hotel window in the city of Oswiecim/Auschwitz. Tracks that are still used in Poland. Tracks that have trains running on them all night long.

Freaky. I know.

You couldn't pay me to stay there again.

Recap:
I've spent the night is Oswiecim, I own multiple (educational) maps of concentration and death camps, and too many books to count, and (of course) DVD/documentaries that are Holocaust/WWII related.

Definitely Blacklisted.

Ummm, Excuse Me? Did You Just Compare Gettysburg to Auschwitz?

Yesterday was rough day. Well, it didn't start out rough; for a Monday it was actually going quite well.

I woke up at 6 am, finished reading a book while listening to Schubert. -- I have always been a Debbie-Downer when it comes to classical music. (I mean, Elvis was born for a reason!) However, I would like to thank one of my very best friends Lawyer Lacey; for bring me to my senses. You're right Lawyer; classical music does make great background music for reading.

At 1 pm I went into work early. I made a quick stop by the admissions office on my campus to pay a balance on my account.

Here is what started my rough day-

I walked into the Student Services office. I waited a couple minutes while the Man behind the counter finished up his phone call with his wife before offering to help me. (I can only assume was his wife). All I heard of the conversation was, "Mmmm.. hmmm. Mmm...hmmm. Honey, can I call yaw back in a bit? A student just walked in. Okay. Love you, too. Buh-bye."

The Man hung up the phone and asked what I needed.

Me: " Oh, I have an outstanding balance on my account. I was just wondering if I can pay that off?"

Man: "Sure. Can I get you're student ID?"

I rattled off my ID.....

Man: "Okey, dokey. Looks like you owe $698.27."

Me: "Yep".

I start writing out a check.

You need to know what I was wearing for this story to make any sense:

I was wearing a red zip-up sweatshirt that has the word POLSKA and the Polish flag on it. I bought it while studying abroad in Poland last spring. Under my zip-up (which was unzipped) was a red Hillel t-shirt with visible Hebrew letters across the front.

As I was standing there trying to write out six-hundred ninety....on the check, the man (out of no where, I'd like to add) pokes my sweatshirt, and says "Is that from Poland?!"

I was taken a little off guard by the fact that this guy had just poked my chest. I answered "Ah, yeah.."

My main concern was spelling all the numbers correctly on the check I was writing.

I didn't agg on this conversation. I just wanted to write the darn check and get outta there. But this man, obviously thought I was there to chat it up.

Man: "Did you go there with school?"

Me: "Yes"

Man: "Really? I have always wanted to go to Poland! If I was going to go to Europe, I'd want to see something like that! Ya know, out-of-the-norm."

Me: "......Oh...that's nice" I said, while pondering this man's enthusiasm about Poland.

I tore the check out of my checkbook and handed it to him.

Man: " So, I hear when you go there, you get to see the concentration camps?!"

Me: "Death Camp. Yes, they took us to Auschwitz." -- of course I didn't want to be all I'm a Holocaust Studies Student on this guy, but there are noted differences between concentration and death camps. I only corrected his assumption that I had seen a concentration camp while studying with our school.

I was waiting for him to print my receipt.

Then, I kid you not, the Man says: "I went to Gettysburg a few years ago. I bet seeing the concentration camp it's a lot like that."

Thoughts in my head:

WHAAAATTT!!! Dude, are you actually comparing GETTYSBURG to AUSCHWITZ?!? Breath. Breath. --Don't agg him on Jules. Grab the receipt and walk out.

Okay, I get the 'death' theme in both cases and how it makes one feel knowing they're standing where thousands or millions have died.

But, comparing the attempted extermination of European Jewry to a three-day battle during the Civil War? Really?

I too, have been to Gettysburg. And yes, it's an ery feeling being on the battleground. But it's not really comparable to seeing the crematoria at Auschwitz.

Just sayin'.

I was almost speechless.

Almost.

Me: "seeing a death camp is pretty different than seeing Gettysburg. But yes, they're both emotional places to visit."

I grabbed my receipt, thanked the Man and walked out of the office. I stopped to put the receipt in my wallet and thought about the conversation I just had.

Gettysburg=50,000 casualties.
Auschwitz= over four million deaths.
I had on a Polish sweatshirt and a Hebrew T-shirt.
The Civil War vs. The Holocaust.

The Man was at least twice my age. He is working as a secretary at a state university; I can probably assume hasn't studied world history in a while. Maybe I should have cut him a little more slack?

Still, he flabbergasted me.

I wish I would have gone back into the Student Services office and given that Man a history lesson or two on the differences between the Civil War, World War Two and The Holocaust.

I could have exited the Student Services Office quoting Clark Gable as Rhett Butler in Gone with the Wind;

"Frankly My Dear, I Don't Give a Damn."

Well, I probably wouldn't have done the Rhett Butler impression. But it would have made me feel better.





It also might have made my day a little less rough.

Donnie Wahlberg. Celeb Nicknames. and Presidents.

It's Monday morning. I suppose you knew that already.

Today's post involves stories of Miss M, Donnie Wahlberg and Celeb Nicknames.


Let's start with a fun memory:

In the early 90's, I shared a bedroom with Miss M. Actually, we shared a bed.
Being that I have a certain tendency to talk in a "Chatty-Cathy-Julie" style; staying quiet at night was hard for this girl. Miss M would yell(usually more than once a night): "Mom, can you come in here and make Julie be quiet?!"
In which, Susie Q would would open our door and gently remind me that it was time to sleep.

That usually only kept me quiet for a couple of minutes.

Miss M had to find a solution on her own, heaven forbid her sleep be compromised by her punk kid sister.

Again people, let me remind you: it was the 90's.

Five letters: NKOTB.

Above our bed, Miss M had hung a NKOTB poster. Now, I love NKOTB as much as the next girl. But when I was 6 years old, Donnie Wahlberg was FRICKIN SCARY LOOKING.

So, to shut her kid sister up (kid sister with an impressive imagination, I'd like to add) Miss M would say in a 'gritted-teeth-tight-lipped' tone (to make her sister understand the severity):

" Julie! If you don't zip your lips Donnie is going to come out of that poster and eat you!!"

Okay. Again, I was 6 years old. Anyone remember what Donnie Wahlberg looked in 1991? Let me remind you:



Point of story: Unless you want to have nightmares of Donnie Wahlberg with a gotee, crazy side-burns, wearing a bandanna and has the eyes-of-the-devil as he's running after you in a forest while simultaneously attempting to bite you; shut up and go to bed.

Next topic for today: I have always loved, loved, LOVED celebs whose Hollywood nickname is their initials.

Examples:

JTT ( Jonathan Taylor-Thomas)


I don't care what year you were born; all girls of the 90's had a JTT crush at one point or another. Excuse me, did you actually think that we were watching Home Improvement because of Tim Allen. Please.

RDJ (Robert Downey, Jr.)

Noooooooooo, not this RDJ:


I'm talking about the sober RDJ. This Handsome RDJ:



Do you remember the film Only You? You shouldn't, it was a terrible film. However, if you haven't seen Charlie Barttlet, you're missing out.

SJP ( Sarah Jessica Parker)
Now, I like Sex in the City, but I first came to know SJP as 'Janey' in Girls Just Wanna Have Fun. Before she married Ferris Bueller:



and who could forget her side-kick, Lynne? Helen Hunt doesn't make the list of celebs with the best nick-names--but I'd hate for my readers to not know what Helen Hunt looked like in this 1984 flick:



No blog about celeb nicknames is complete with out these fine men:



JFK, RFK, and EMK. John Fitzgerald, Robert Francis, Edward Moore

and.... since were taking presidents:



FDR (Franklin Delano Roosevelt) ps-- I am not a fan of that guy.

and



LBJ (Lyndon Baines Johnson)


Here's a personal favorite:



MLK, Jr.


The next two pics involve men who are not known for their nicknames. However, this is my blog and I'm breaking the rules.

I love this picture of Theodore. I can't help but wonder what he's laughing at.



I'll end this post with a little something to make you smile on a Monday morning: